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    Hey MusicMan!

    musicman

    ​​​​​​​Can I ask you more about your sex life? I know you have revealed a lot in other threads, but I didn't want to hijack someone else's post.

    Does your wife participate with using toys on you? Ever thought about having her put a sleeve in between her thighs and hold it firm while you penetrate it? I'm thinking doggystyle position would be hot! So you can slap her ass some too!

    Just curious how much she stays involved. And if she uses any toys herself. Or if you are able to perform oral on her at all?

    obviously only what you want to reveal here. I am just curious and have a gift for listening to people who want to talk.
    ~ Married guy, but want to have sex with a guy. ~

    #2
    Originally posted by KssnCzns View Post
    musicman

    ​​​​​​​Can I ask you more about your sex life? I know you have revealed a lot in other threads, but I didn't want to hijack someone else's post.

    Does your wife participate with using toys on you? Ever thought about having her put a sleeve in between her thighs and hold it firm while you penetrate it? I'm thinking doggystyle position would be hot! So you can slap her ass some too!

    Just curious how much she stays involved. And if she uses any toys herself. Or if you are able to perform oral on her at all?

    obviously only what you want to reveal here. I am just curious and have a gift for listening to people who want to talk.
    As I stated previously, my wife and I have been married over 35 years. We enjoyed sex from before we got married, up until a few years ago when she had some medical issues, and innercourse became too painful for her. She had a few severe UTI infections that were caused by innercourse, so between that, and the painful vaginal walls, that was it for her. She did go to an ob/gyn doctor, and he offered her some medication, but she didn't want to take anything. She is allergic to certain medications, so she only takes the bare minimum. That, plus age thins out the vaginal walls, making it even more impossible to have sex. When all of that happened, she lost all interest in sex of any kind. That includes innercourse, outercourse, and any type of foreplay. Of course, she post menopausal, so that dramatically decreases a woman's sexual desire.

    And, while all of this was going on, and she continued to complain of pain, or squirm, and pull me out, I began to lose erections because I was afraid of hurting her. It got to a point when all of this began, that "Mr. Limpy" would be an unwelcome guest, so I decided to see a urologist. I was a candidate for Viagra, so I tried it. It was a low dosage with minimal success. The next step was to have a suppository placed through the urethra, which wasn't too pleasant. It didn't work. Next were injections directly into the penis, which were extremely painful. I don't know who could think of sex after those injections!! It didn't work anyway. So, I was prescribed a higher dosage of Viagra, just in case we wanted to give it a go again, which we did one day last year with the same painful results. So, I'm on my own. It's easier for me because all of our kids are grown up and out of the house, plus, we sleep in separate bedrooms. I have non-combat PTSD, nightmares, and night terror, so, for her safety, we decided it was better this way.

    Now previous to all of this happening, we bot had sex toys we'd use on each other to get things going from time to time. I had never heard of Fleshlight up until maybe a few years ago, so the masturbator I first had was just a cheap one, but it worked.

    We both discussed masturbation way back when we first got married. We even mutually masturbated together from time to time. Sometimes it would be cross mutual masturbation, and sometimes just on ourselves, as we watched and listened to each other. Some of those sessions were with vibrating dildos for her and the masturbator for me. Sometimes we'd finish by climaxing and holding each other, and sometimes we'd just put the toys down and make mad, passionate love. When it was her time of the month, that was "free play" for me. But, as I said, all of that is behind us now.

    As far as spanking and slapping her, even if it is in play, I've never done that. I always tried to be romantic, and not do anything to hurt her, even if it is in fun.

    Comment


      #3
      musicman , you, my friend, are the bigger man here. Damn... my heart goes out to both of you in your relationship. It seems you two have weathered some tough storms, and are still riding it out together. We have faced our own storms, but mostly from things we have done wrong. We have passed our 31st anniv, and still fully active sexually. But certainly have other issues in our relationship.

      I hope the best that can be had for you and your wife. I don't know if there are options to help bring you two back in the same bed, but I hope there is. And I hope you two do have a great relationship aside from the sexual. I know we sometimes just make-out like teenagers just kissing like crazy and rolling around on the bed with our clothes on still! I am one hell of a kisser! I dated her best friend before her & I got together, and even she tells the wife from time to time that I am the best kisser she ever kissed. LoL

      I too am a romantic, sentimental guy..... but a good firm slap on the ass is HOT!!! HaHaHa!
      ~ Married guy, but want to have sex with a guy. ~

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by KssnCzns View Post
        musicman , you, my friend, are the bigger man here. Damn... my heart goes out to both of you in your relationship. It seems you two have weathered some tough storms, and are still riding it out together. We have faced our own storms, but mostly from things we have done wrong. We have passed our 31st anniv, and still fully active sexually. But certainly have other issues in our relationship.

        I hope the best that can be had for you and your wife. I don't know if there are options to help bring you two back in the same bed, but I hope there is. And I hope you two do have a great relationship aside from the sexual. I know we sometimes just make-out like teenagers just kissing like crazy and rolling around on the bed with our clothes on still! I am one hell of a kisser! I dated her best friend before her & I got together, and even she tells the wife from time to time that I am the best kisser she ever kissed. LoL

        I too am a romantic, sentimental guy..... but a good firm slap on the ass is HOT!!! HaHaHa!
        We both found out that there's much more to marriage besides sex. I think out marriage is stronger today than it has ever been. There's no more sexual tension between us. There's no more "I'm not in the mood", and moments like that, or "I have too much else on my mind", or the classic, "not tonight, I have a headache", or "I'm too tired". We both know what to expect from each other.

        I'm not sure about your wife, but when pre-menopause and menopause hit, their estrogen decreases, which leads them to not wanting anything to do with you, or sex. I already weathered that storm. While every women faces it eventually, I can personally give you some advice. Be prepared for the Lioness to come out in her...and not in a sexual way. Anything you say or do can make them "snap" just like that. And the best thing to do is to back off into your own space, and give her as much space as you can.

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by musicman View Post
          We both found out that there's much more to marriage besides sex.....
          well, that's not very encouraging for me...

          Originally posted by musicman View Post
          I'm not sure about your wife, but when pre-menopause and menopause hit, their estrogen decreases..... Be prepared for the Lioness to come out in her...and not in a sexual way. Anything you say or do can make them "snap" just like that. And the best thing to do is to back off into your own space, and give her as much space as you can.
          I think she has been in pre-menopause most of our marriage. And I have it down to an art... withdrawing into my shell until safe to come out.
          .
          ~ Married guy, but want to have sex with a guy. ~

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by KssnCzns View Post

            well, that's not very encouraging for me...



            I think she has been in pre-menopause most of our marriage. And I have it down to an art... withdrawing into my shell until safe to come out.
            .
            Your situation may be totally different than mine as far as the sex goes. But for us, we had a lot of sex before marriage, and a lot of sex early on. We do have four grown children, but I can tell you, two of her pregnancies were very difficult, and the period of recovery. We enjoyed sex, but it became more like work, instead of pleasure. Besides the medical problems she had, things were starting to get boring or like the same old routine. She didn't approve of certain things, so we usually did the same things over and over. When we talked about having a sexless marriage, I was worried at first that she may have found someone else, or maybe was going to file for divorce. But, we talked about it openly, and we both understood the risks with her medical condition, although it did take time to adjust to.

            When it came to the discussion of "You're on your own", we discussed freely about me buying toys for myself. I did have one early on in our marriage that I used when it was her time of the month. At that time, we were sleeping in the same double bed, and I used that sex toy freely in front of her. Most of the time, she turned on her side away from me, and sometimes she watched.

            Well, those were the days. So now, I'm flying solo. I have no other choice.

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